We have been living without cable now going on 3 months. It’s been challenging at times adjusting to not having every single channel in the world that has absolutely nothing on to watch. As I read that, I wonder why it’s been challenging!

It’s also been a breath of fresh air not seeing all the networks come up with sensational headlines to garner my attention. Or the other garbage that’s on (which does NOT include The Big Bang Theory OR The Walking Dead, just so we’re clear).

But, you would have to be living in a cave to not know what’s happening recently with the recent deaths of black men. I see my good intentioned friends of various races sharing things about “Dear White Mom” or “White Friends” and I immediately read. I mean, I’m white so they must be talking to me.

But I’m so much more than a white person! And if I haven’t showed that to you then I must suck really bad as a person. My life is like a never-ending puzzle that continues to be put together by my experience and relationships. Today alone, my pieces included the following:

• Wife
• Mother
• Friend
• Daughter
• Believer
• Cheerleader
• Chauffeur
• Motivator
• Personal Finance Counselor
• Spider Killer
• Sarcastic Slayer
• Home Renovator

And that’s just in a matter of 2 hours. None of that involved the color of my skin. For the love, please realize that I’m more than just a white person. I know that I’m more than the color of my skin. And so are you.

I’m not at all trying to minimize what is happening. I think we have to come together and stop labeling one another. We have to raise our kids to do the same. There is a lot of corruption in this world. The real change happens with how we treat one another and by encouraging our children to stand up for the rights of everyone. To love everyone and never be willing to accept injustice.

After several months we have decided to move back home. It has been 12 long years since we moved from our hometown for my job. It was only Paul, T and me at the time. Oh, the irony of that considering I now work from home. Since making our decision, I have had several people ask me why we are making this huge leap at this time.

Honestly, we don’t really have one single reason for moving back home. When we started to discuss the idea in earnest with the boys in May, T was totally on board which surprised me the most. He will be a sophomore and it’s not exactly the best time to move for a teenager since he has so many strong relationships where we currently live. I think the idea of 4-wheelers, hunting and fishing, and land to roam was enticing for him.

Andon was gung ho, but he’s up for anything. He’s only 7 so it won’t be as tough a transition. Plus, he has NEVER met a stranger. Caleb was the one that was most tentative about the idea since he also has his close group of friends. He is so outgoing and, truly, everyone loves him because he will talk to and play with anyone regardless of age. I’m sure he’ll be fine once he hits a football field or basketball court though.

We wanted to purchase land. So when we really started to get serious about this move, we knew our hometown had to be considered. After visiting home a few times over the past year, we would see the farmland and acreage and knew that was something we wanted. Unfortunately that isn’t available in abundance where we currently live. Land where we are is priced ridiculously. No, seriously. The prices are outrageous and that’s without a house. Because of this, we would halfheartedly keep an eye on land going for sale back in our hometown, and would chat about the idea but not strongly consider anything until this past May.

Our family is there. It’s our hometown, and the in-laws are there as is my mom. While there aren’t many cousins our boys would hang out with, the grandparents are reason enough for us. We want the boys to have their grandparents in attendance at sporting events easily. While they make it to as much as they can where we are now, it is still quite the haul (1.5 hours or more depending on where they would play).

And while this sounds morbid, I always thought about where we would be buried if something happened to us. I didn’t feel like our current place made sense. I felt like we should be back in our hometown which meant we should live there so it was easier for the boys and the rest of our family. The things I think about :)

We want simplicity again. I’ve had quite the year dealing with the plethora of health issues that people told me were “in my head.” Finally, after meeting with an amazing NTP, I knew that my adrenal fatigue, low-functioning thyroid and digestive issues were extremely serious. I had to reduce stress and needed to find peace and calm in my life again. I feel like this will be that for me – for us. The drive will be shorter for Paul to work too. Not by a whole lot, but that did factor into things too. I need my man to be healthy too :)

The boys are growing up entirely too fast! T will be a sophomore this year, Caleb will be going into the 5th grade, and Andon will be a 2nd grader. I feel like I have been working nonstop over the past 6 years, helping so many other people that my job has taken me away from my family just as much as my corporate job did. Granted, this was a blessing as Paul lost his job in 2012, but I wanted to reconnect with my boys on a deeper level that I can’t quite put into words. I suppose knowing that you literally have 3 years before the oldest leaves will do that to a momma.

Less stress. I know stress is what you sometimes create yourself. While I am eliminating some stress by working far fewer hours now, I want to reconnect with the beauty in the everyday. The first time I visited the property we are moving to, by myself, I could hear the sound of the trees blowing in the wind. Those aren’t sounds you ever hear living in a subdivision. The rustling leaves instantly put me into a state of peace and calm. In a way, I felt like it was God’s way of telling me that this place could very much be what I needed – what our family needed.

We wanted to find our forever home. Our current home is great. We live in a great subdivision and there are always kids playing in the cul-de-sac. Even with all of the updates we have made, it just hasn’t felt like “home.” I can’t really describe why I feel that way either.

We always said our dream would be to own an old farm home with several acres. While the home we are moving to isn’t technically a farm house, it is an old country house with so much charm and character. The boys will have land to roam and explore, I will have space to have chickens eventually (yes, ME!) and attempt growing a garden again. We can eventually turn the pole barn on the property into an indoor basketball court/space for the boys to play. We may eventually make it bigger. That is something I have wanted for so many years since the boys are always at someone else’s court – now they can be at their own.

We have lots of work to do on this house, and we have so many plans to make it ours. The ideas came flooding to us as soon as we saw the house. We looked past the odd layout of the kitchen, small closets (this will be major, major shock for me), wallpaper, and extremely small bathrooms. For the most part, it’s all cosmetic and can be updated (with lots of money, of course :-). But we can do it all on our own timeline though since nothing is technically “unlivable.” I will have lots of pictures to share in the coming months.

We will have new friendships to make – me just as much as the boys! I will miss my BFF dearly (who currently lives just 2 blocks away), and our kids growing up together over the next few years. But, I know we will always be besties - we have been since we were 4 and no amount of miles have ever affected that. Our kids will be too. While I do still have some friendships from growing up there, things change so much over the years. I don’t want to impose on someone else’s life if that makes sense.

We will eventually get into a groove of our daily routines, and I pray we feel peace and gratitude for the journey of going home. We are ready – everyone is.

Oh, and that view above doesn’t hurt. It’s right across from our new home. So much different than the subdivision life we have been living for the past 12 years!